Under the Chicken Coop

Outside our office is a chicken coop that was previously occupied by chickens. Now, it sits empty. The virtue of an abandoned chicken coop is the dirt underneath the coop. It’s great fertilizer. Especially when it has been “ripening” for a year.
So, this spring I decided to take advantage of the coop poop and scoop some for the little garden I was planting….tomatoes, zucchini, lettuce…etc

The story begins. On this particular spring day, the day I was going to harvest the chicken poop, the soil was soggy around the chicken coop due to rain. Not a problem. I found some lumber and made a “bridge” to reach underneath of the coop, which was my destination. Great, except the “bridge” sunk into the mucky gunk as I was crossing it. Oh, what the heck, it will be mucky fun excavating coop poop. Clothes and shoes will get washed later.
Once entering the under-the-coop poop area, which is about 3 feet high, and 4 foot square area, I realized I would be stooping to scoop the poop. Not a problem. Scoop a while, stretch the back, stoop and scoop some more (stoop, scoop, stretch, repeat). Next challenge: I needed containers to carry the poop to the garden which is at our house across the street. So, I found an old metal bucket that seemed sturdy enough to carry poop. And the scooping began.
There was not enough room to put the metal bucket under the coop, so I had to scoop, and toss the poop into the muck by the bridge, then get out from under the coop, stretch my back, re-scoop the poop and put it in the metal bucket. I had a nice system working for me now. Stoop, enter under-the- coop, scoop the poop, toss the poop out from under the coop, get out from under the coop, stretch, re-scoop the poop, put in bucket, carry bucket across bridge, through the compound, then across the street, dump poop in the soon-to-be-garden, and return with the empty bucket and begin the process over again.
After about 20 repetitions I was pooped out (tee hee). And still did not have enough fertilized soil to my satisfaction. I took a break and went back to work. I had to dig out the already rooted weeds growing under the coop that had taken advantage of the nitrogenous, healthy soil, but that was OK too. I just kept digging, scooping, tossing, carrying……

While routing around under the coop I found various interesting items, that are worthy of comment and speculation. It was no surprise to find tea bags and kitchen refuse, the kitchen is next to the coop. No surprise to find cigarette butts either, every Abkhaz male and many females smoke and freely toss butts wherever they choose. Under the coop is a good place.

It was the pantyhose and undies I uncovered while scooping that surprised me most, and made the whole experience worthwhile. I giggled and thought of a likely scenario to explain the undies and pantyhose.

And so the story begins one lazy summer evening a year or two ago:

Boy says to Girl: “Let’s meet tonight - somewhere private”.
Girl says to Boy, “Let’s meet in the back corner of the MSF compound after dark. I know the guards, they will let me in.”
So, they arrive outside of the compound after dark. Girl says to Boy “You can climb the fence while I distract the guard.” Girl knocks at the large metal door and the guard approaches and she says “my mom is the cleaner for MSF, and she forgot something. I am coming to get it.” The guard lets her in without further questions.
Boy easily scales the fence surrounding the property and they meet at the corner where the chicken coop is, the most private area, where no one, not even the guards will see them. They giggle and crawl under the coop, tell stories to each other, do the things that young lovers do. Then they hear the guards opening the iron gate letting in an expat to do some late-night work in the office. They stay quiet, hidden under the coop, looking in each others eyes, enjoying the adventure of making love under the chicken coop and hiding from interlopers. They are joyous, delirious. Soon it is time to leave, she crawls out first. As she is walking toward the guards area she remembers she left behind some clothing, but the guard sees her and she can’t retrieve them now. She once again talks to the guard, while Boy scales the fence. Boy and Girl hug farewell and go their separate ways, likely to meet again another night in another secret garden.

All is well, under the chicken coop, then and now.


I liked my work that day. I enjoyed making up the Girl-Boy story while I was scooping. I would never have imagined this late-night adventure had she not left her things behind.

The day has left a permanent smile in my heart like many simple days that bring profound joy. That mucky, back-breaking, repetitive, stinky day of scooping poop to put in the garden brought me pleasure.

I have an abundant harvest now, 3 kinds of lettuces; a red fluffy leafed, a green frilly leafed, and a tall straight one, some spinach and of course lovely flowers. The tomatoes, basil and zucchini should be ready this month.

later, g